With Confidence

Okay, so I admit that I've kind of been ignoring my blog because I was embarrassed... but after logging on here this afternoon and seeing that yes, I did infact have more than 1 person following me, I decided to give it another go and hopefully get back into the swing of writing :)

So I think I should probably straighten out the whole frothing girls thing... It turns out that if you just ignore them and play hard to get, they lose interest... I still feel bad about it because I don't really talk to them any more and my mate is still a little bit awkward when I'm around his girlfriend, but it's more or less over :)

I think I should also add that I love uni! (other than the classes and exams and stress, of course...) Last night, I went to a party the uni threw! The theme was Hookers and Deviates - so there was an excuse for the girls to wear nothing but lingerie and the guys to turn up shirtless or wearing cheerleader's uniforms ;)! It was awesome! I went as Vince from Shamwow! ;) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vm03Dgu_yXA because i could never pull off the muscle look and I'm pretty sure I'd put more than a few people into the emergency department from idiopathic brain anneurisms if I wore a dress - but in my modest costume everyone mistook me for security because of the headpiece :S haha I even got chatted up by a guy using that as a pickup line! hahaha but he was smoking so that's a big no. :P

After last night I realise now how far I've come and how much i've grown in confidence over the past few months... In the past I couldn't string together anything that even resembled a coherent sentence while speaking to a guy because of the constant fear always nagging at the back of my mind that I'd slip up, offend someone, show someone something about myself that would give me away and result in me eating concrete ... I was talking to guys wearing next to nothing - hell I think i'm even crushing on the guy who came as a fireman stripper! That would have had me in hysterics before... but i was strangely at ease and I think it's because I've finally fully accepted my sexuality :D Hey, I was comfortable enough to flirt... granted everyone was pretty drunk and i was relatively sober, so they probably won't even remember it today... but that's beside the point...

One thing i didn't appreciate finding out last night after alcohol had loosened everyone's lips (and not in the good way) was that people i went to school with were spreading rumours about me... yet again. But it's alright... I got through it before, and once people meet and get to know me better they'll see that really, i'm not that bad... :)

Until next time ( I'll work on not being so slack), thanks guys!

BJ